Benefits of walking

Our wellness team sent out an email including the benefits of walking. I thought this was interesting.

BENEFITS OF WALKING
 Burns calories
 Strengthens back muscles
 Slims your waist
 Easy on your joints
 Strengthens your bones
 Lowers blood pressure
 Allows time with family and friends
 Shapes and tones your legs and butt
 Cuts cholesterol
 Reduces risk of heart disease, diabetes, & more
 Reduces stress
 Sleep better
 Improves mood and outlook on life
 Can be done almost anywhere
 Requires no equipment
 It's Free

Source: http://www.thewalkingsite.com/howtowalk.html

Good verse

The Offer of Life or Death
Deuteronomy 30: 11-20

11 Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. 12 It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, "Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?" 13 Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, "Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?" 14 No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it.

15 See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. 16 For I command you today to love the LORD your God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the LORD your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.

17 But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, 18 I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess.
19 This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20 and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

Gleam of Dawn

The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever brighter till the full light of day.

Proverbs 4:18

Good Verse

When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the LORD your God for the good land he has given you. Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day.

Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. He led you through the vast and dreadful desert, that thirsty and waterless land, with its venomous snakes and scorpions. He brought you water out of hard rock. He gave you manna to eat in the desert, something your fathers had never known, to humble and to test you so that in the end it might go well with you. You may say to yourself, "My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me." But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today.

If you ever forget the LORD your God and follow other gods and worship and bow down to them, I testify against you today that you will surely be destroyed. Like the nations the LORD destroyed before you, so you will be destroyed for not obeying the LORD your God.

(New International Version)
Deuteronomy 8:10-20

Choices

There are times in life when we make big decisions. We have seemingly complicated choices and sort through pros and cons to figure out the best course of action.

But other times....for many of us...most of the time…the challenges we face aren’t monumental. But rather almost mundane.

Sometimes the choice we make is simply to get out of bed in the morning. To not hit the snooze button again. Sometimes we choose to push through a bad mood.

Sometimes we simply keep moving when we want to give up.We fight the voice of despair. Of temptation. Or pointlessness. Of boredom. Of unmet expectations. Or regrets. And maybe even the desire to just be a kid again...no responsibilities. No pressure.

But as it turns out these little choices we make add up to something of great significance. They shape our attitude, our personality, our character- our lives.

So my challenge to you and to myself is: enjoy life as deeply and as often as possible.
And when those heavy moments come- don't give in. At least not for long. Find little things to restore your joy. And keep going. As it turns out....shadows disappear in the light.

Ode to Poetry

This weekend I've been reading some of the classic poems. For a moment I wondered if there was a point to reading through the word pictures, comparisons, etc when you could just say what you want to say. In today's culture we are very to the point. We like information and quickly!

And though simplicity and conciseness of words are something that I often appreciate and find impactful, there is something beautiful about these lines. A small peek into the thoughts of the author and the questions of his or her time. It's a different, sometimes slower way of thinking...yet often lovely and refreshing.

Here are a few poems I wanted to share

A red, red rose

By Robert Burns

O, my luve's like a red, red rose,

That's newly sprung in June.

O, my luve's like the melodie,

That's sweetly play'd in tune.

As fair art thou, my bonie lass,

So deep in luve am I,

And I will luve thee still, my Dear,

Till a' the seas gang dry.

Till a' the seas gang dry, my Dear,

And the rocks melt wi' the sun!

O I will luve thee still, my Dear,

While the sands o' life shall run.

And fare thee weel, my only Luve,

And fare thee weel a while!

And I will come again, my Luve,

Tho' it were ten thousand mile!

The Lamb

By William Blake

Little Lamb, who make thee

Dost thou know who made thee,

Gave thee life, and bid thee feed

By the stream and o'er the mead

Gave thee clothing of delight,

Softest clothing, wolly, bright;

Gave thee such a tender voice,

Making all the vales rejoice?

Little Lamb, who made thee?

Dost thou know who made thee?

Little Lamb, I'll tell thee;

Little Lamb, I'll tell thee:

He is called by thy name;
For He calls Himself a Lamb

He is meek, and He is mild,

He became a little child.

I a child, and thou a lamb,

We are called by His name.

Little Lamb, God bless thee!

Little Lamb, God bless thee!

The Eagle

By Alfred, Lord Tennyson

He clasps the crag with crooked hands;

Close to the sun in lonely lands,

Ring’d with the azure world, he stands.
The wrinkled sea beneath him crawls;

He watches from his mountain walls,

And like a thunderbolt he falls.

Preservatives

So I have been attempting to eat more foods that are closer to their natural state or have less confusing ingrediants in them. However, this afternoon I had the realization that some preservatives are actually good for you and keep food from going bad. I came across this article regarding good vs bad preservatives from a men's health website and thought it was worth sharing.

The Good.

Preferred preservatives

The following preservatives are, according to the FDA, completely safe for consumption. They aren’t known to cause allergic reactions or adverse health affects when used in small quantities. Most are natural -- either squeezed out of Mother Nature’s products or built, chemical by chemical, to be just like them. And, believe it or not, some of them are actually good for you.

Vitamin C
That’s right, in addition to being an essential vitamin, a potential cancer fighter and a great nutritional supplement, good old vitamin C is a great preservative. The same properties that make it a super vitamin -- mainly its ability to keep oxygen from wrecking shop -- also keep foods fresh and colorful.Where it’s found: Because it does double duty as a preservative and as a vitamin, vitamin C (known by its technical name, ascorbic acid, on ingredient lists) is used in a surprising number of foods. It’s found in cured meats such as bacon and ham, for instance, and many fruit juices. It’s also put in cereal flours, jellies and preserves, canned mushrooms, and artichokes.

Citric acid
Citric acid is vitamin C’s cousin and is an equally impressive natural preservative and additive. As far as acids go, it’s pretty weak -- incapable of eating a hole in a tabletop, for instance. Still, it works wonders in food, where it helps to keep bacteria and mold at bay. Oddly enough, most citric acid isn’t derived from citrus fruits. It’s manufactured one molecule at a time by the mold -- aspergillus niger. The mold happily produces citric acid as long as it has a nice supply of sucrose (sugar). Citric acid is found naturally throughout the body and causes no side effects in 99.9% of the population. A very, very small portion of the population is intolerant of the stuff, but the condition is so rare as to be nearly nonexistent. Where it’s found: Citric acid is used extensively in soft drinks as a preservative and to enhance flavor. The acid adds a sour punch to whatever it’s in and turns up in many foods that need an extra sour kick. Citric acid is also used in some household cleaners to balance pH levels.A few more of the good and then we introduce you to the bad guys...

Sodium benzoate and benzoic acid
Nature provides some great preservatives. Sodium benzoate and benzoic acid, even though they sound like they were created in a laboratory, are two of the best. They are found in cranberries, prunes, greengage plums, cinnamon, ripe cloves and apples. Both compounds have great antimicrobial properties and are added to many foods to keep them from growing bacteria and mold. It can, however, give some foods a funny taste, so it is legally limited in the U.S. and other countries.Where it’s found: Sodium benzoate and benzoic acid are found in tons of products, including jams, relishes, beverages, dressings, salads, pie and pastry fillings, icings, olives, and even sauerkraut.

Sorbates
Sorbates are the superheroes of preservation. Tasteless, odorless and without side effects, they are used throughout the food industry. They include sorbic acid, potassium sorbate, sodium sorbate, and calcium sorbate. Each compound keeps bacteria and yeast from growing out of control in many foods.Where it’s found: Because they’re so effective and nontoxic, sorbates are used in a wide variety of foods, including cheeses, dips, yogurt, sour cream, bread, cakes, pies and fillings, baking mixes, dough, icings, fudges, toppings, beverages, margarine, salads, fermented and acidified vegetables, olives, fruit products, dressings, smoked and salted fish, confections, and mayonnaise.

The Bad
Problem Preservatives

BHA, BHT Two of the most thoroughly tongue-twisting preservatives, butylated hydroxyanisole (BHA) and butylated hydroxytoluene (BHT) have a dubious history. The two compounds are antioxidants, which means they keep volatile oxygen atoms from wreaking havoc on fats. They basically scoop up oxygen before it has a chance to make fat go rancid. Some studies have shown that these two compounds can cause cancer and tumors in lab animals, and there is evidence that some people have trouble metabolizing them. However, the compounds are also being tested as treatments for herpes and AIDS. Both BHA and BHT were banned in U.S. baby foods and were completely locked out in Japan, Romania, Sweden, and Australia.Where it’s found: You’ll find BHA where you’ll find fat. It can be in butter, meats, cereals, baked goods, snack foods, dehydrated potatoes, and other processed foods. It’s also used in chewing gum and beer.

Sulfites
Potassium bisulfite, potassium metabisulfite, sodium sulfite and sulfur dioxide
Cheap wine can give you a horrendous headache. Most wine aficionados will blame the pain on sulfites; preservatives that are added to wine to keep it from turning into vinegar. Unfortunately, these people are just perpetuating a myth. Red wine can cause headaches, but there is no scientific evidence that sulfites have anything to do with it. That being said, some people are legitimately allergic to sulfites. But for those people, the compounds cause asthma and other allergic reactions, not headaches. Because of this, the U.S. requires a warning label for foods and wine that contain sulfites. The country has also banned the practice of spraying sulfites directly on fresh fruits and veggies to preserve their vibrant colors.Where it’s found: Sulfites are found in all wine. They are a natural byproduct of fermentation and all winemakers across the world add some to keep their wine from spoiling. Sulfites are also found in dried foods and dehydrated potatoes.

Sodium nitrite
Here’s one more reason not to eat hot dogs: They contain sodium nitrite, which can form cancer-causing chemicals in your gut. Sodium nitrite is a salt that’s been used for decades to cure meats and fend off clostridium botulinum -- the bacterium that causes botulism. It’s essentially the ingredient that turns bacon and ham bright red. The compound can react with proteins in the stomach or in the frying pan to form N-nitrosamines, the cancer-causing agents. Thankfully, ascorbic acid or erythorbic acid is now added to cured meats to prevent the formation of N-Nitrosamines. Still, some people worry that the preservative can cause cancer regardless of this preventative step.Where it’s found: Sodium nitrite is found in cured meats, including ham, bacon, hot dogs, and some sausages. It’s also in smoked and cured fish.

http://www.askmen.com/sports/foodcourt_150/181_eating_well.html

Keep Your Hopes Up

Keep Your Hopes Up

TODAY'S SCRIPTURE
"And you shall be secure and feel confident because there is hope…"(Job 11:18 AMP)

TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria
In the world today, it seems there are so many things trying to pull us down. Every time you turn around, you're being bombarded with bad news. Life can be difficult, but there is a peace that God can give you in the midst of the challenge. If you'll keep your hopes up and keep your mind focused in the right direction, you'll get to the place where you'll say, "I should be upset. I should be losing sleep at night. But I'm not the least bit worried. I know God is still on the throne. I know He's working this out for my good."
When you keep your hopes up, you eventually step into the anointing of ease. You don't drag around discouraged or despondent. You're in faith, hoping, believing, and expecting. That's when God will move on your behalf. That's when you'll look up and say, "You know what? I don't struggle in this area anymore. God took the pressure off. Things are starting to fall into place." You may not be there just yet, but there is hope! God who promised to deliver you is faithful, and He will lead you in victory all the days of your life!

Remember, appreciate, believe.

Isaiah 53
1 Who has believed our message and to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?
2 He grew up before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground.He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.
3 He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
4 Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted.
5 But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.
6 We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all.
7 He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.
8 By oppression and judgment he was taken away. And who can speak of his descendants? For he was cut off from the land of the living; for the transgression of my people he was stricken.
9 He was assigned a grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death, though he had done no violence, nor was any deceit in his mouth.
10 Yet it was the LORD's will to crush him and cause him to suffer, and though the LORD makes his life a guilt offering, he will see his offspring and prolong his days, and the will of the LORD will prosper in his hand.
11 After the suffering of his soul, he will see the light of life and be satisfied; by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many, and he will bear their iniquities.
12 Therefore I will give him a portion among the great, and he will divide the spoils with the strong, because he poured out his life unto death, and was numbered with the transgressors.For he bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

Wedding Website!

We have a wedding website! There will probably be additional information added so feel free to check back later too :)

http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/KristenMeyer&JoeHarmon

The Six Super Foods Every Woman Needs

The Six Super Foods Every Woman Needs

The foods you really need to stay you healthy and strong

By Colette Bouchez
WebMD Feature

Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD

From the food pyramid to the Internet to your local bookstore, there is certainly no shortage of advice on nutrition and healthy eating. But with all the media hype surrounding many “health foods,” it can be hard for a woman to tell the nutrients from advertising ploys.

“We are sometimes led to believe that a specific food is healthier than it really is,” says nutritionist Elizabeth Somer, MS, RD, author of Age-proof Your Body. “Or that you need some exotic or expensive form of certain nutrients to gain benefits -- and most of the time that’s not true.”

Moreover -- as happened in the '90s when low fat cookies made everyone temporarily forget about calories -- Somer says some of today’s advertising sways us toward one healthy aspect of a food to keep us from noticing other, less healthy attributes. “A product may advertise itself as ‘no cholesterol’" she says, “but it still can be loaded with bad fats or tons of calories. You have to look at the total food to know for sure.”

NYU nutritionist Tara Miller, MS, RD, agrees. “You have to read the whole label, look at all the ingredients and the portion sizes, before you know for sure just how healthy a food is.”

Or you can let us do the work for you! To help you zero in on the healthiest foods that women can eat, we asked a panel of experts for their advice.

What follows is a description of the six super foods they say every woman needs. While these foods won’t cover all your nutrient bases, incorporating them into your diet as often as possible can help give you a wide range of protection.

Super foods for women: What you need

Super Food # 1: Low-fat yogurt

Goal: 3 to 5 servings a week

What it does: As a health food, yogurt is almost as old as, well, good health itself. But experts say evidence continues to accumulate that reveals its benefits in many new and exciting ways. And not just yogurt. Somer tells WebMD that any fermented dairy product -- including kefir -- contains healthy “probiotics” -- bacteria with the power to protect you in myriad ways.

“There is a suggestion [that yogurt] may decrease the risk of breast cancer,” Somer says. ”And there’s very strong evidence it can reduce problems associated with irritable bowel syndrome and inflammatory digestive tract disorders -- both conditions that impact women more than men.” Additionally, she says, yogurt can help reduce the risk of stomach ulcers and vaginal infections.

Enjoy a cup of yogurt at breakfast, lunch, or snack to help meet the U.S. Dietary Guidelines recommendation for three servings of low fat dairy each day. “It’s loaded with bone-healthy calcium -- something every woman needs more of at every age,” Somer says. One cup of yogurt has about 448 mg of calcium, compared to just 300 for eight ounces of skim milk.

The key, according to Somer, is to choose a low fat yogurt with live cultures -- like Lactobacillus acidophilus. And do check the label, Somer advises. Some store brands may not have the level of cultures found in more established brands.

Also important: Skip the fruit-on-the-bottom or other flavored varieties. “Too much sugar,” says Somer, who also reminds us that, no, those two blueberries on the bottom of the container do not constitute a serving of fruit!

Super Food # 2: Fatty fish -- like salmon, sardines, and mackerel

Goal: 2 to 3 servings every week

What it does: The healthy factor in fish is omega-3 fatty acids, and specifically two types known as DHA (docosahexaenoic acid) and EPA (eicosapentaenoic acid).

“Fatty fish not only plays a vital role in the health of the membrane of every cell in our body, it also helps protect us from a number of key health threats,” says Laurie Tansman, MS, RD, CDN, a nutritionist at Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York.

Some of those threats include heart disease, stroke, hypertension, depression, joint pain, and a number of illnesses linked to inflammation, including lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. Somer says fish may even offer some protection against Alzheimer’s disease.

While many foods -- such as walnuts, flaxseed oil, and some mayonnaise brands -- claim the benefits of omega-3 fatty acids, Somer cautions that only the DHA or EPA forms of omega-3 can be directly used by the body.

“What you get in foods like walnuts and flaxseed oil is an omega-3 acid known as ALA -- alpha-linoleic acid,” says Somer. “And while it’s certainly good for you, it requires a process in the body to convert it to DHA. And that conversion process can be influenced by a variety of individual factors.”

The good news: You are likely to see a wheelbarrow full of new products supplemented with DHA slowly making their way to market in the coming year. Currently, Kellogg is reportedly developing a cereal fortified with DHA, while a company called Nutri-Kids has already launched a DHA fortified ready-to-drink milk product. You can also find eggs fortified with DHA and, says Somer, certain brands of soymilk.

Super Food # 3: Beans

Goal: 3 to 4 servings every week

What it does: Low in fat, beans are a good source of protein and fiber and may have protective effects against heart disease and breast cancer. Beans may also play a role in stabilizing female hormones, says nutritionist Susan Krause, MS, RD.

“Beans have been around so long that most people don’t view them as a fancy new health food,” Krause says. “But in fact, they are among one of the healthiest things a woman can eat.”

In studies published in the International Journal of Cancer, researchers found that beans in general, and lentils in particular, may have some protective effects against breast cancer. In research published in the Archives of Internal Medicine, doctors found a relationship between a lower incidence of cardiovascular disease and a higher intake of legumes. Well known legumes include peas, beans, lentils, and peanuts.

As a source of both soluble and insoluble fiber, Krause says, beans can help lower cholesterol, while their level of a nutrient known as isoflavone can help in the regulation of hormones and may aid with PMS, perimenopause, or menopause symptoms. Although soybeans have among the highest levels of isoflavones, other sources include red clover, kudzu, mung beans, alfalfa sprouts, black cohosh, and chickpeas.

“Beans also contain something called protease inhibitors, which may help protect against breast cancer,” says Krause. Protease inhibitors help slow the division of cancer cells and in this way may prevent tumor formation.

Last but not least, if you are in your reproductive years, beans can give you a steady supply of folic acid -- essential if you should become pregnant.

Super Food # 4: Tomatoes (or watermelon, red grapefruit, red navel oranges)

Goal: 3 to 5 servings each week

What it does: The powerhouse nutrient in all these fruits is lycopene. And, according to Miller, while the headlines touted its protective effects against prostate cancer, more quiet research has shown it has tremendous health benefits for women as well.

“Research is starting to show that lycopene may protect against breast cancer,” Miller says. "And it’s also a powerful antioxidant that can help a woman fight heart disease.”

The very latest research shows it may also help keep you looking younger longer by protecting against UV damage from the sun.

Super Food # 5: Vitamin D fortified low fat milk or orange juice

Goal: At least 400 IUs of vitamin D daily

What it does: “Essential to helping the bones absorb calcium from the gut,” says Somer, “vitamin D helps reduce the risk of osteoporosis and may be vital in reducing the risk of diabetes, multiple sclerosis, and tumors of the breast, colon, and ovary.”

Indeed, recent studies from the University of California San Diego suggest that vitamin D has the potential to prevent up to one–half of all breast, colon, and ovarian cancer in the United States.

Somer tells WebMD that a growing body of research indicates many women may be vitamin D deficient. “A combination of staying out of the sun (which the body uses to manufacture vitamin D) and using sunscreen, which blocks the synthesis of vitamin D, has resulted in many women hitting a dangerously low level of this nutrient,” says Somer.

While Vitamin D is found in salmon, mackerel, tuna, and sardines, experts say fortified foods, such as milk, are the best source.

Super Food # 6: Berries (blueberries, strawberries, raspberries, cranberries)

Goal: 3 to 4 servings every week

What It Does: In a way similar to wine, these fruits may protect your body with powerful anti-cancer nutrients known as anthocyans, which are believed to play a role in cell repair. Krause says research shows anthocyans may decrease the risk of several cancers, including those in the breast and gastrointestinal tract.

“These berries,” says Krause, “are also high in vitamin C and folic acid, which is essential for all women in their childbearing years. And they offer powerful anti-oxidant protection, which not only protects the heart but also may protect against skin aging, from the inside out.” Moreover, she tells WebMD that cranberries may help reduce the risk of urinary tract infections in women, while the nutrient, lutein found in all the berries, can help protect vision.

You'll be there

Today I heard a song on the radio that caught my attention. While I may not agree with all the theology...I think it's a beautiful song about someone looking for hope. It reminds me of the words spoken by Thomas "Lord I believe, help my unbelief" Check it out.

You'll be there by George Strait.

http://music.aol.com/song/youll-be-there/6689046

Cool Lyrics

One of my friends shared a Christmas song at our Bible Study last night.

The song is called "Cry of a Tiny Babe." I really like the imagry in the chorus.



Like a stone on the surface of a still river


Driving the ripples on forever

Redemption rips through the surface of time

In the cry of a tiny babe



Merry Christmas Week! :)

What do I really want?

Hi everyone,

I subscribe to a "Crucial Conversation" newsletter and I thought I would share the advice for this week. The author talks about how generally peaceful people can become easily angered and violent due to the pressures of our economy. And he gives some advice for dealing with these people.

"So what do you do when someone screams in your face and tries to bait you into a fight—for no apparent reason?

I learned an incredible and helpful response from an alert reader in Brazil who had been car jacked in Rio de Janeiro. She had read in our book, Crucial Conversations, that one of the ways to take the violence out of a situation is to quickly establish mutual purpose, which she did. She looked at the would-be carjacker and stated, “You tell me what you want and I’ll be glad to help.” The surprised thief asked her to take him to the nearest ATM and withdraw the maximum amount of cash she could, which she did. “Now what can I do?” she asked. “You can drive me across town,” he answered. When the two arrived at the appointed destination, the thief didn’t take her car, just the cash. Most importantly, he didn’t hurt her. He actually thanked her for her cooperation and then fled. Now, the skills in the book were not intended to instruct on negotiating threats of actual physical violence—obviously the best solution there is to get out as quickly as possible. But in a situation where the reader was trapped, keeping her head helped her avoid some common and possibly fatal results.

Following this reader’s lead, when the crazed guy in front of the sandwich shop tried to pick a fight with me for almost dinging his car, I was prepared. I apologized profusely several times. I then established mutual purpose by asking him what I could do to undo the possible harm. Of course, there was no actual harm to his car, but I was willing to do whatever would appease him. Now remember, I was not trying to negotiate a fair settlement. I was not trying to save face in front of others. I was not trying to look macho or feel in charge. Instead, I was doing my best to avoid getting pummeled by a guy who looked both willing and able to pummel me. And, make no mistake; he had a plan for getting there. He wanted me to argue back. He wanted me to get in his face where he could then push me away from him and I’d invariably push him back—and then he would have me. Then he could smack me around because I had pushed him.

But I didn’t follow the screaming stranger’s nefarious plan. Instead I apologized, admitted to my thoughtlessness, and genially sought to make reparations. As a result, the fellow had no place to go with his anger. All that was left for him to do was to forgive me and send me on my way with a stern warning—which he did.

I know this message may seem a bit bah-humbuggy and far from the kind of gift you might expect this time of year. But then again, some gifts you receive are more practical than your standard dangly earrings or pungent aftershave. Sometimes you get a new security system or hefty new locks on the door. I’ve given you something you can lock away in your head. You may not need it right now, but one day when you’re climbing out of your car listening to Burl Ives wish you a Holly Jolly Christmas and you’re distracted just enough to let your car door swing a quarter of an inch too far—well, you’ll now know what to say and do. And that, I hope, will lead to a happy and safe holiday."

Great Verse!

“Oh, that we might know the Lord! Let us press on to know Him. He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn or the coming of rains in early spring” (Hosea 6:3).

OR we could jump in the pool!

I was on MySpace tonight and was notified that one of my friends had been tagged in a picture. I looked at the tagged pictures and came across the following. And had to share. I don't think any other words are necessary really.....

Bisous

My precious kitty died this morning. She was the best kitty I could hope for and I will miss her. This poem is dedicated to her.


Precious Bisous, my little one.
Always loving, kind and fun.

I'm grateful for the time you gave
Unselfishly fighting, always brave.




I'll miss your greetings and soft gray furr
I'll miss the sound of your happy purr.




My little kitty, precious one.
Rest in Peace, Rest in Love.

Weighing Your Options

Happy Wednesday!

I subscribe to a number of newsletters, but one of my favorites is Crucial Conversations. They describe difficult situations often submitted by readers and offer practical and non-biased ways to handle these issues and move forward in a positive direction.

I thought that the below story was especially good advice for anyone who is any a tough spot at work right now. It gives some good options for change, if you feel change is needed.

Dear Crucial Skills,

Ten of us are struggling with how to deal with the bad behavior of our boss. Most of us are contemplating leaving this really good company because of it. Two others have quit already because of the bad and even abusive behavior and told the HR director and CEO. Nothing has changed.

Signed,
What Next?

Dear What Next,

As I write this, the stock markets across the planet are on a roller coaster ride that’s bringing little joy to anyone. With that kind of insecurity as a backdrop, your question becomes especially sensitive. Even in the best of times, many people are reluctant to address concerns with their boss because they think it might put their jobs or their future opportunities at risk.

I would love to comfort you with our research that suggests if you practice crucial confrontations skills well, the odds of you being hurt by your attempt are quite low. However, your situation is a bit different. Your colleagues have already escalated this to HR and the CEO. You didn't mention that you have spoken to your boss directly—but for the sake of my response I’ll assume you have already done this (if you haven't, you need to step up to this crucial confrontation first thing). And still, after all these attempts, you’ve seen no change. What next?

You’re obviously in a very tough situation and your options are limited. But you do have options. Let me list them. You are in the best position to decide based on your perception of risk and your personal values which of these is the wisest choice for you. So, I’ll simply lay them out and hope considering them will assist you in making your decision.

1) Commit and cope. You could choose to accept the security of your current situation and cope with the abusive relationship. If you do so, I urge you to have the maturity to acknowledge that you are making this choice and not to blame your boss for behaving in the future the way he has in the past. You know what you’re signing up for—take it or leave it.

2) Give it up and quit. Second, you could decide that even an uncertain job market is more desirable than the certainly of a rotten work environment. Of course, it would be best to look around and solidify options as much as you can before making the leap—but if you’ve tried your best and can’t influence change where you are, change your address.

3) Escalate further and hope for the best. If there are ten of you who are dissatisfied, you have significant power to further escalate the behavior problems—provided you stick together. Though this may seem like unusual advice, I would encourage you to confront your boss as a group. Do it in as safe and respectful a way as you can (re-read Crucial Confrontations before acting). Limit your complaints to the one or two most salient ones and then detail what behavior you would like to have instead. Express your openness to changing yourselves if there are things you and your colleagues are doing that provoke your boss's bad behavior. But let your boss know that “no change” is unacceptable.

Before holding this discussion, share your intention with HR and the CEO. Ask them for their support. Ask them if you can report the outcome following the meeting. If they refuse to support your effort, then you must go back to options 1 or 2 above. If HR and the CEO will not support you, then either you are deluding yourself about the problem, or you are in an organization that is determined to enable your boss's bad behavior. It’s time to make a choice.

4) Prop the door open then escalate. Finally, you can combine #3 with a careful retreat plan. Shop around. Solidify some exit options. Be sure the back door is propped open and then take action to influence change.

Unfortunately, there is no easy solution. However, failing to clarify what you really want and not maturely choosing your best course of action will only add the misery of powerlessness to the dissatisfaction of abuse. Powerlessness is frequently as much fiction as reality. You do have options—and I urge you to exercise them to your greatest benefit.

I wish you the best and would be pleased to hear what you decide and how things turn out.

Warmly,
Joseph

Life

Yes, I realize that's a rather intense blog name. In order to use such an impactful word....I should really write something deep, insightful, brilliant.

I'm not sure that's going to happen....but tonight I feel that melancholy pull to reflect and write and somehow express this small sadness I don't know why I feel.

Recently I heard a talk about growing up in God without growing old and the speaker said "How many are the children of God. How few are the friends."

Sometimes I feel like I could be a friend of God. But other times I feel like a little kid. I feel overwhelmed, challenged, sad, tired.... And I feel like I talk to God like I would talk to my dad when I was little.

I guess this is one of the many reasons why its good that God can encompass all roles. Sometimes we all need some milk and cookies and a big hug.

Why I like Country Music

So this morning I was reminded of one of reasons that I like country music. It reminds me of the important things.

This morning I heard the song American Soldier and I thought about it. I don't understand the war, but I'm grateful that there are people who are willing to risk their lives to defend our Country.

Then I started thinking about the many songs that are played. Yes there are dumb ones and yes sometimes the tune is just too much for me, but there are so many good words. Reminders of important values. And even reminders of God.

Check out these lyrics:


"Well, I'm what I am and I'm what I'm not. And I'm sure happy with what I've got. I live to love and laugh alot. And that's all I need. -Kenny Chesney- That's all I need

Do want you want, do want you wish. It's your life but remember this. There's bound to be some consequences. Sneaking under other fences. Clay Walker- Then What

"It was no accident me finding you Someone had a hand in it Long before we ever knew Now I just cant believe your in my life. Heavens smilin down on meAs I look at you tonight." Tracy Byrd- Keeper of the Stars

"Half way through the service While the choir sang a hymn He looked up above the preacher And he sat and stared at him He said'forgive me Father' When he realized That he hadn't been unloved Or alone all his life His arms were stretched out As far as they'd go Nailed to the cross For the whole world to know"- Jimmy Wayne. I love you this much