Today I was reminded of something.

I was reminded that's its normal to feel.  That a part of being human is having emotions.  And a part of having emotions is realizing that different days can bring out different feelings.

I think that as Christians once you reach a certain level of adulthood, it can be easy to feel like we are supposed to be joyful and peaceful at all times.  So any negative deviation from this can be stressful and frustrating.

Have you ever entertained thoughts like the following?

What's wrong with me?
I'm a Christian, shouldn't I be happy all the time?
Why does this get me down?
What am I supposed to do with these feelings?

Tonight, I read a blog that encouraged me.  The blog is from John Eldredge author of books like Wild at Heart and Captivating.

http://blog.ransomedheart.com/

I really enjoy his style of writing.   Books like Epic and Waking the Dead- the Glory of a Heart Fully alive are beautiful, inspiring, creative, and hopeful.

But to read some of his blogs, I realize that this writer of incredible worship-filled books, still struggles with emotions.

It's part of life.  Perhaps especially if you are given to poetic and contemplative thoughts.

So then, what do you do?

I really like the verse that John shared on his blog.  It's from Proverbs 4:23 and it says "Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Also, interesting is the French translation, "Garde ton coeur plus que toute autre chose, Car de lui viennent les sources de la vie."

Interestingly I translate the last  part to say, from it (your heart) comes the sources of life.

So, while its natural to feel emotions like discouragement, worry, frustration, and sadness, we must guard our hearts against dwelling there and making a pattern of despair.

If you are feeling down, I recommend seeking to understand your feelings, talking with a trusted friend or family member and engaging in activities that bring peace and inspiration to your day.

But at the core of our hearts we must believe that God loves us.  God has a plan for our lives.  God is sovereign over all things and He makes everything beautiful in His time.   He is our redeemer our friend and our rescuer.  And He is preparing a home for us that will be incredible beyond our imagination of wonder.

God is good! And He can handle our grumpy moments and our exhilarating moments and everything in between.  With His help we are more than conquerers through Him who loves us.

A Tale of Two Kings

This morning I listed to a sermon about pride. King Saul and David were both mentioned as examples. (Stories in First Samuel 13 and 2 Samuel 11-12)

What I find interesting is what happened next. King Saul doesn't appear to repent but instead continue further in the path of pride and eventually takes his own life and David takes his place as king.

When David is confronted with what he has done, David immediately responds to the realization by saying "I have sinned against the Lord." You can read in the Psalms of David's cries to God and his faith in his love.

"Hide your face from my sins and blot our all my iniquity. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Psalms 51:9-10

"I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever." Psalms 52:8b

Both David and Saul sinned against God. But one king fell to ruin while the other forgiven was blessed with a part in the lineage of the Messiah.

What can we learn from this? Probably many things, but one thing that's worth considering is the state of the heart. Are we proud and always right? Do we refuse to accept God's words if the differ from what we want? Or are we open to God's leading and humble before Him? When we make mistakes do we admit it and ask forgiveness? Do we know God's character so that we can say like David, I trust in His unfailing love?

A good poem

Out in the Fields with God

The little cares that fretted me,
I lost them yesterday
Among the fields above the sea,
Among the winds that play,
Among the lowing of the herds,
The rustling of the trees,
Among the singing of the birds,
The humming of the bees.

The fears of what may come to pass,
I cast them all away
Among the clover-scented grass,
Among the new mown hay,
Among the rustling of the corn,
Where drowsy poppies nod,
Where ill thoughts die and good are born,
Out in the fields with God.

~ Louise Imogen Guiney ~

Judgement Day

I woke up this morning to the same world that was here when I fell asleep. I checked Facebook to see if anything unique had happened in another country and was greeted with a post that said something like, "It seems the end of the world is not today."

I turned to my husband and said "Oh good, looks like the world isn't ending." Instantly I regretted my words.

I admit, I too have found the humor in the so called judgement day for May 21, 2011. After all, the Biblical math I saw that supports this theory isn't very solid. I've read some funny jokes on the internet.

But even as I find amusement in the sarcasm, I also feel my heart fighting against the laughter.

After all, just because his calculations and Biblical knowledge is off to me, we both still want the same thing. Wouldn't it be wonderful if God did come back today?

One day He will. And maybe He can use the publicity of this well-intentioned but misinformed event to ask the question of people across the world, "If God did return today, would I ready?"

One day, whether its today, tomorrow, or years in the future, the world we wake up to will be a decidedly different one. And that is cause for great joy for those who eagerly await His return.

Moments Before a Change

There are times in life when you wish you could slow down the clock- suspend things where they are for a little longer.

The week before your wedding perhaps- more time to enjoy being engaged, to perfect the last minute details, to feel more prepared for the new phase of life approaching.

The last few days in a beloved city- more meals at your favorite restaurants, more chances to spend quality time with friends and family.

The last year before a child goes off to college- time to savor each little everyday thing that when they have left for school will bring joy and perhaps a touch of sadness as you remember them.

The last week of a decade. 29 sounds so different then 30. 59 so much younger than 60.

Where does time go? Some days it feels like time is ever before you stretching out with its immense possibilities.

Other days life and breath seem so fleeting. Each moment something to savor and capture. Some days you want to hold on for dear life to the present.

But life goes on. If we didn't graduate high school we might not meet that special someone in college. If we didn't move past pregnancy we'd miss the child's first smile, first bicycle ride, first prom date.

Life is full of firsts. It's also full of memories, traditions, and favorite activities and people.

And so we continue to live each day as it comes and trust our tomorrows and the story that is our lives with the One created us and makes all things beautiful in His time.

Joy

As a Christian I have a lot of knowledge in my head about joy. And I understand many true reasons why we should have joy.

We've been saved, redeemed!

If God is for us, who can be against us!

Jesus has prepared a place for us and is coming back one day to take us home- to a place filled with such joy- our minds can only dimly comprehend how beautiful our new home will be.

Jesus loves me, this I know.

The problem then isn't necessarily with the knowing or believing but rather the feeling.

How do you connect your mind with your heart? How do you make this joy part of your spirit, your emotions, the face you portray to the world on days when you don't naturally feel it?

If this question were posed to me I imagine I could come up with some type of response. But for day I think I'll just leave the question as it is.

For though I am imperfect, though I don't have all knowledge for which I might desire, this truth I still know. Jesus loves me. For the Bible tells me so.

Thoughts for the new year

I can hardly believe we've reached the end of 2010. I probably say this every year, and every year it seems true. Time continues to flow on- days turn to weeks, weeks to months, and months to years.

This year I will turn 30. This doesn't seem possible. Yet when I think back on my travels, and time with family and friends, it does seem possible. I'm very grateful for the wonderful memories I've made and hope for many more!

Our pastor recently shared this verse from 1 Corinthians 8. "But knowledge puffs up while love builds up."

Truth is a wonderful thing. Proverbs is full of great verses on wisdom. Truth, knowledge and wisdom are important and worth seeking.

But without love, what do they mean? One can know all about God, but unless you know Him and love Him, what have you gained?

Knowledge can also divide. People can interpret words differently; ideas can be divisive.

But love includes, pursues, brings beauty and life. God's love shines into our lives and tells us who we are; it makes life beautiful.

So this year I wish for truth and wisdom, but most importantly I wish to increase my grasp of the height and depth and width of the incredible love of God. May this be your wish also.

Happy New Year!